"She looks exactly like her father" I have heard this statement for number of times in last 3 months and after that I try to find him in her face. When she is sleeping I try to search his oh-so- familiar features. I never return empty handed. She truly is like him. And that's the reason I miss him badly when I am with her. The people who advised me to take a "chance" when he is away in field so that my separation will be easy, are extremely wrong. It's been almost a year we are leaving apart and never in my life have I missed him as much as I have in this year. Entire pregnancy period I spent thinking "How would it be if he was here with me" and wanting him more and more each passing day. I thought once the baby comes I won't even understand where the time is flying. I won't miss him as I will be busy in newly acquired Mommyhood.. But here this girl comes with all the traits from her baba and makes me think about him all the time. So I thought of writing for him. I want to tell him that there is not a single moment when I don't miss him. I want him to know how much I need him by my side and most of all, his girl is growing up!!
I remember how awkward he used to get around babies. I loved his honest confession that he didn't know what to do with them and I would tell him "You will know when you have your own." And he surely did. The moment he held our girl in his hands in hospital he was a different man altogether. He became "A Father".
A new girl entered in his life who immediately became centre of his universe. He used to quietly sit beside her and observe her every movement curiously. He had his own bunch of questions about her growth. I could see a child-like enthusiasm in my soldier. He used to look so proud when anybody said that she looks just like him. I am a hundred percent sure he has his plans ready for her.
He got to spend a month with her and he had every possible moment with her. (I am already out of priority list.) All that time he had only one question "when will she grow up?" He wanted to pick her up, laugh with her, cuddle her, play with her but could not. And now as she is doing all this, here I am hopelessly hoping somehow he could be here, with her, with us!!
"Dude, she is growing up!!" When she gives her good morning smile to me I wish you were here to see it. She laughs and giggles looking at her grandpa and chachu and it kills me to know it could have been you. She raises her hands and jumps at me I miss you real bad.
I know how badly you miss being with her. You see her growing up through pictures and videos (God bless the technology). Now we do not speak all lovey dovey on our calls, those are just about her. I love explaining all her activities to you. Sometimes I just feel so jealous of her because nowadays she gets all the attention from you. But can't help loving the father in you. I am falling in love with you all over again!!!
Come soon daddy dear your baby girl is growing up fast.. And both your girls are waiting to be with you!!
- Swati 😃
